One of the greatest schools of life is the school of marriage (or committed-for-life relationship). If you’re really invested in the partnership not only will you and your partner learn about yourselves and each other and have opportunities to grow, together you can make a big impact on the world by applying and sharing what you learn. One of the best ways to learn about relationships is to read, watch or hear from others about the struggles in their relationships, struggles that you and your partner may face someday.
The quickest ways to fail in your partnership is to assume that you know everything, nothing will ever change and don’t have any room to grow personally or in your relationship. When we make assumptions like this we’re limiting our personal potential and the amount of fulfillment we can experience in our relationship. My partner and I entered into our relationship not assuming that we would have to change each other, but that change would happen and that together we’d work through the changes, supporting and encouraging each other as and when they happened. We’re on the cusp of another big change, one that will challenge us but one that will give us even more freedom to love each other and make our place in the world.
For most of us we don’t have a choice in how the first 18 years of our lives will go: we’ll be in school. Once we’ve graduated from high school we’ve got the option to drop out of college or finish or pick it back up in the future. We don’t have that choice in the earlier years, most of us are forced to go by our parents and by the culture we live in. That’s not how the rest of our lives go, after that we’ve got the choice to stay or go anytime we want. For some of us this is a good thing because it gives us the freedom to explore and be our own person. For others of us though it gives us too many easy outs and we don’t truly commit to things and people in our lives.
No, I don’t advocate staying in a terrible relationships, but I do think that many of us don’t give the relationship the chance we should. What about you? Are you giving your relationship the attention it needs to grow and thrive, or is it not a priority for you?
“I’m extremely fascinated by marriage. I want to study marriage. I want to learn about it. I want to know it. I want to figure out whether or not I want to do it. I’m not just going to leap into it, because that’s not good for anybody.” Adam Levine