It’s not easy to make a relationship work. Any time you have more than one person involved there’s bound to be some disagreement, fighting, miscommunication and disappointment. One thing I think makes a big difference is having multiple points of connection. In other words, if all you have keeping you and your partner together is the fact that you made a kid together, you’ll have a lot more challenges than those who have similar interests, enjoy spending time together, like similar foods, enjoy similar movies, have kids and both like to travel. There will always be differences because you’re two different people, but if you have a strong and large foundation to work with you’ll have a better shot at success.
I’m always amazed by the stories of people who say they met and knew the other person was ‘the one’ instantly. I mean if this was a perfect world where no one had ex’s, trouble at work, health issues or financial worries it would be more believable, but in this day and age it seems almost like a fairy tale rather than reality. But with as many people are as in the world it seems more likely than ever that we would be able to find our ‘one,’ which is good news. However, sometimes we’re not ready for something that permanent. And sometimes we discover that the person we thought we were with isn’t who they really are, even after knowing them for years.
So what’s a person to do? I say start with friendships. Have friends, meet new people, get out and live life, don’t jump in too quickly but don’t be afraid to make a decision, try to work things out when they get difficult but don’t stay with someone who is abusive, don’t assume that there’s someone better out there just because you’re afraid of doing the work it takes to make a relationship work, and don’t avoid relationships because you’re worried it won’t work out.
“Experts on romance say for a happy marriage there has to be more than a passionate love. For a lasting union, they insist, there must be a genuine liking for each other. Which, in my book, is a good definition for friendship.”