Your Value in the Relationship

This month I’ve been asking a really important question to myself, my clients and in my newsletters: do I value myself, and do you value yourself? For too many years we’ve undervalued the contribution we can make for the world, and just as important that we are beings of incredible and immeasurable value. If we truly valued ourselves would we smoke and drink as much as we do? Would we do the drugs we do (both medical and recreational)? Would we watch as much TV? Would we work jobs we hate? Would we stay in abusive relationships? Would we eat all that we do? If we really thought about our value and if we really valued ourselves would we live the lives we do? I think the answer is a resounding no.

This month we’ve been talking about being part of a team, and (spoiler alert) next month we’ll be talking about being healthy. One of the things I’ve been reminded most from this month is that teamwork means you’re not alone. I know we live in a very busy world where we’re practically always connected and always on the go and always dealing with others, and yet so many of us are lonely.

A relationship is one of the most important teams that we’ll be part of in our lives. It’s the person we choose to share our deepest secrets with, our biggest fears, our dreams, hopes, ambitions and frustrations. They’re the person we expect to be there when we need them, and to be there for them when they need us. Our partner should be one of the best parts of our life. But if we don’t believe we are a valued member of that relationship, if we don’t feel appreciated and if we can’t express who we are without judgment, we’ll quickly lose our passion and interest in life.

If your partner isn’t supportive of who you are and what you need it’s time to consider if your relationship is really the right one for you or if it’s time you found someone who values you as much as you do.

“In any personal relationship, what we really have to give is ourselves. The more we value ourselves, the more we attract loving and appropriate life partners and friends to us…The key is how much we value ourselves.” Madeline C. Gerwick

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