You probably know but Valentine’s Day is just a few days away. This weekend and especially this Sunday people around the US will be celebrating their love, spending lots of cards, flowers and gifts and (according to statistics) making babies. It can be easy to fall into the trap of doing what everyone else is doing and trying to show your partner you love them based on what the world says, but the numbers of divorces and unhappy marriages around the world speak to what a poor idea this really is.
Your partner and you only work when and because you do what’s right for you. This means you have to try things out. No, don’t do anything you don’t both agree with or would be abusive mentally or physically. But it means that you can’t just accept what the world tells you is right or best and try to fit yourself into that mold. The same is true for you and your kids, don’t just show them love in the average ways, love them in ways that mean something to them.
What does this look like? Maybe it means you give your partner a massage, maybe it means having dinner on the table for them, maybe it means supporting them at their athletic events, maybe it means celebrating holidays not on the official day, maybe it means watching their TV shows instead of yours, or maybe it means visiting a pet shelter so they can get their puppy fix without bringing one home.
This Valentine’s Day don’t just cop to a card, flowers and chocolate. Get your loved ones gifts that will show them you know them and love them for who they are. If you’re struggling with your relationship take time to ask them what would make them happy, and share with them what would make you happy and feel loved too. Let this Valentine’s Day be the start of a new and beautiful chapter to your relationships. What does love look like for you?
“The hardest-learned lesson: that people have only their kind of love to give, not our kind.” Mignon McLaughlin