I’m thinking about an intricate topic today: intimacy. There are lots of levels of intimacy that you can experience, from being with a handful of strangers at an event and experiencing it together to physical, mental and emotional unity with a significant other. The dictionary actually has some really great definitions on the topic: a close, familiar, and usually affectionate or loving personal relationship with another person or group. A close association with or detailed knowledge or deep understanding of a place, subject, period of history, etc. An act or expression serving as a token of familiarity, affection, or the like. The quality of being comfortable, warm, or familiar.
What am I seeing over and over here with the topic? Words like familiarity, comfort, affection and detailed keep coming up because no matter how the term intimacy is being applied that’s the experience you should be having. The thing is most of us don’t have intimate moments during our days. We have lots of experiences, but intimacy isn’t one that we always think about. We think about having exciting, educational, fun, immersive, intense, personal, sexy, fulfilling experiences. Intimacy is something we’re almost embarrassed about or ashamed of, maybe because we’re not super good at doing it.
But as I said intimacy comes in many levels, so those moments that you complete the sentence for your partner, when your partner know what you’re going to say before your story gets there, those memories of your childhood or of your children that warm you up and you treasure, the [terrible] national or local event that you’ll remember forever, or the teacher that changed your life in some way, are all moments of intimacy along with those physically intimate moments you have with your partner.
Intimacy starts with a willingness to become close with something or someone. It doesn’t have to be this planned out, built up, super deal, intimacy is found in the little moments of life. What or who will you get to know on a more personal level this week?