For many of us this month started off with talks of freedom because of July 4th, Independence Day. Freedom is an important topic to talk about with regard to raising kids and being in a relationship. It’s important to teach your kids about freedom, from both the perspectives of costs and benefits of pursuing it. Relationships automatically mean that you give up some of your freedoms, which is OK in a healthy relationship because what you gain from the relationship is worth more than what you may lose.
Teaching your kids about freedoms is something you can do in both reward situations and when you’re dealing with issues. One great parenting technique is to present your kids with 3-5 options in a given situation and let them choose what they want of the options you’ve preselected for them. This works well with food, with homework, with chores and fun activities. It’s one way to break through a blossoming tantrum or help both of you regain control. It also teaches the kids how to make decisions and choose what they want in their lives which is important for when they’re adults.
Freedom in a relationship often exists simply because you’re in a relationship with someone who has similar interests, passions and pursuits as you. Those shared pursuits creates the freedom to be who you each are. But since you are individuals and not identical in every way, there are some different desires you each have. When it comes to them there’s always the option to give and take or finding a middle ground. It all comes down to good communication, trust and knowing your partner to make sure that you’ve got freedom, your partner has freedom and you’re both happy and healthy together.
As much as freedom is an individual choice, it’s really a group effort because what you choose as freedom impacts others. It’s why it’s important to teach the next generation well about freedoms and be comfortable in who we are while still being willing to learn, explore and grow. What freedoms are you working on today?