Looking at the Good Things

Every relationship, every family, and every person has things they can work on. No one is perfect and that’s just the way it is, we’re all works in progress. It’s important to work on those issues because the issues and imperfections we’ve got can get in our way to achieving success and becoming the best person we can be for ourselves and others.

I love my partner but if I wanted I could find quite a few things to complain about regarding him, he’s not perfect, and if you asked him he would tell you I’m not perfect either. But I’m not with him because I think he’s going to become perfect or to fix him. He’s much more than the issues and imperfections, he’s a thoughtful, caring, smart, funny and loving guy.

Perfection isn’t possible, but what if we took more time to focus on what’s right than what’s wrong? I’m not saying we should ignore the bad or not good stuff, in fact something that my partner and I do ask each other from time to time is if we can do anything better or be better in some way for the other. So it’s not that we’re ignoring the issues that each other have, my partner and I are always trying to do and be better for each other, but we choose to celebrate the fact that we’re together and each day we’re able to share our lives together.

Yes, your kid may have gotten an F on a math test, but they did well on the other projects that they just wrapped up, and they’re excited about a chapter coming up in history. Yes, you may have made a less-than-perfect dinner tonight but you cleaned the house, changed the sheets, organized the toys, washed the clothes, caught up on the paperwork and bills and helped your sister pick out colors for their soon-to-arrive baby’s room. It’s not about getting everything right or being perfect, but taking the time to celebrate the good stuff. Just because your kid isn’t great at a subject in school doesn’t mean they’re destined to fail at life. Just because you can’t cook doesn’t mean you aren’t a good parent or partner. You don’t have to be good at everything, but you are good at many things.

What are you good at that you can celebrate today?

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Choosing to Celebrate

Today in many parts of the world two events are being honored: Passover and Good Friday. Both events remind us of challenges, of pain and unhappiness, and that the journey isn’t always easy. But they both are just the beginning, because Passover is really a celebration, and Good Friday is a precursor to the celebration of Easter. You’ve probably heard it said before: that the darkest part of the night is just before the dawn. Many times in our lives we’ll feel like we’re at our lowest point, only to rise higher and stronger than ever. Over the past few years it seems like we’ve just been talking about the tough times, about the failures we’ve been with our partners, the messes we’ve made at our jobs, the mistakes we’ve made as parents, and ways we’ve let the rest of the world down.

But this weekend is an opportunity to celebrate. Yes, you may look at it as a challenge with family that always stresses you out descending on your world. Yes, it’s always a little stressful to think about cooking for double or more than you usually do. Yes, it’s stressful if you own a business that does extra or special business during this time.

But I believe it’s important to take time to celebrate. Maybe you won’t be able to celebrate this weekend because of how busy you are with work, so take time next week or next weekend to celebrate with your partner, kids and those you do enjoy spending time with. Don’t lock yourself into celebrating only when the calendar tells you that you can. It’s not the calendar date that makes the day or event special, it’s the people you’re with and ability to celebrate life and the blessings you have.

“My motto is: more good times.” Jack Nicholson